Begging for attention
by Swordmouse
Summary: The human had changed. Zim was changing. He hated it, but he could only deny it for so long and he was determined he would get what he wanted.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! Swordmouse here! Finally bothering to upload something. It's been quite a long time hasn't it? Sorry about that. Its not for nothing though! As I've said before, I'm currently doing multiple IZ roleplays with someone and we have both expressed hope to turn them into fics. I think you guys'll love them, and I can link you to the rps if you want to read them as they are. (Unedited)**

**This right here is a several chapter fic that I've basically finished. I'm just smoothing out the details. The idea was in my head for a long time and I had to do something with it. I'll upload more as I finish editing, because the first draft of the whole thing IS finished actually. For once I can say I finished something with chapters. Haha. Ha. Ha.**

**Enjoy! Read and Review please!**

Years had passed.

Dib had changed.

Zim had not changed, or so he told himself. Him? Change? Why? No, he would never change. He didn't need to change. He was a perfect specimen of the superior irken race! There was no reason for him to change!

He wasn't changing! So these sensations and thoughts, had to be from a sickness! Or maybe all paranoid imaginations brought on by the foul pollutant fumes and nauseating summer heat of planet earth? Yes, yes those excuses could work to fool himself, at least for a time.

If only he could find the real cause and stop all this without addressing the horror that was probably the real source.

Zim was changing. It was all Dib's fault.

That annoying, obsessive little worm baby... So tall now, so intimidating. He was everything Irkens idealized, what every irken wanted to be. He was tall and lean with well-developed but not grossly bulging muscles, he was quick and agile and clever and as far as humans went, he had no 'imperfections' an irken would frown at. He was well groomed and chose good clothes and he... Dib was... He was perfect.

He was even... Zim wasn't sure how to describe it for a long time, or he told himself he didn't, because he knew exactly what it was and he hated that he could think such a thing.

Physical attraction.

How could this be?

Irkens weren't even supposed to feel this towards each other, how was it possible Zim felt it for HIM?!

He was... He was... What were the words humans used? Pretty? Cute maybe? Gorgeous?

How could Zim have such appreciations towards such a lowly species? That was just wrong!

Zim thought he shouldn't think such things, he told himself that was horrible, and gross, the invasive thoughts angered him and made him sick with himself.

He still thought those things anyway. They wouldn't go away.

He wanted something. He wanted something he'd never wanted before, or in a way that he'd never wanted anything before. And that scared him to death because he genuinely didn't know what the thing itself was, but it was a developing weakness for sure and he had to end it!

Why wouldn't it stop!? Why couldn't he ignore it?! Why wouldn't it go away?!

Zim wasn't changing, not like Dib, not outwardly. Only inwardly. Only in squishy, vulnerable 'feelings.'

Dib had gotten just generally better. Zim was not... He was not getting any better. How could he? He would ask himself. He was Zim! He was already perfect, so he could not get better right?

But no one else seemed to think he was so great, and slowly, he picked up on that and started to question.

Zim had a habit of vocally yelling his own greatness at almost every opportunity. He did it because no one else ever said it and that made him feel small. it had been that way from the beginning. After long enough he'd managed to wholly brainwash himself so that he believed his own declarations. He just had to remember to shout it out frequently! But now his shouting and 'I AM ZIM's didn't have the same effect. All because his nemesis and perfect match in battle had gotten better and taller.

It was a terrifying thing, to question his own superiority. The complex had given him so much security, especially against Dib, was melting. He was not secure, and he was loosing confidence in himself.

Dib had always viewed him as a threat. Dib had watched him obsessively out of paranoia. The fact that someone viewed him as so powerful had bolstered Zim's ego for years. It had been a glorious feeling.

Now, Dib, who'd changed and become so amazing, had lost interest in him.

And it was horrible.

It made him feel so short and insignificant.

He was changing and it was all Dib's fault!

Well... No.

No, that gave the stink-beast a little too much credit.

Just as all this was coming to a head, Gir broke down. His eyes went black, he became unresponsive, and there was nothing Zim could do to fix him anymore.

Even irken technology didn't last forever.

That was one thing he'd never seen coming. That was probably the biggest change.

"You stupid robot!"

The irken shook the limp, cold metal body in his tightly clenched hands, but to no avail.

He shocked Gir, and replaced various parts, but his minion of so many years would not turn back on.

Eventually he stored Gir away in hopes of finding parts that might fix him someday but for now the most he could do was helplessly sulk.

He was alone now.

He really, really was. Even his messages to the tallest were going unanswered. He panicked, as this had to mean his transmission systems were failing! He had to get them fixed! He would be in trouble if he did not report in soon!

But no. A tiny part of him knew- knew he'd taken too long and was no longer relevant.

He'd been here... How long? Five years? Seven years? It was too long.

But he could fool himself. He'd gotten good at it. That was how he'd even managed to survive. By lying to himself until everything was okay. Because even what he was, his very mind, was problematic by very important irken standards.

He never got any messages. No one contacted him. Without Gir and without his connection to the tallest it was magnified, and it started to cause a weighted, sedated, distraught feeling in his chest.

He wandered around his base at night, plan-less, without any objective, just scrounging for ways to pass the time.

He was alone. He was overlooked. He was forgotten.

Even Dib. Even Dib was overlooking him.

No! NO! He could NOT let the human forget.

In school, Zim's disguised eyes glanced across the classroom more frequently then ever before.

Dib sat slouched, which was both a pity and a blessing to the irken, it was less entrancing but less intimidating. At full standing height Dib was about six feet. He was no tallest but... To Zim... Well, Zim's head just came up to his collar bone.

That was downright shameful.

The invader glared, breathed in deeply and slowly and shaking in rage, and he let it out the same way, jaw clenched, hands fisted, sitting tensely in his desk as Ms. Bitters droned on. His back was strait. He sat as tall as possible so that he strained his muscles and was sore the whole day.

It wasn't fair! He was superior. He was better then Dib! How could it be that his nemesis was taller then him? So much taller and so skilled and so...

It was horrible. It was embarrassing.

It was breathtaking and THAT was the worst part of all.

How could that be? It was a scary feeling he didn't understand and he wanted it to stop.

He had too much appreciation for the human. He observed the earthling's physical changes with more then scientific curiosity and he could find nothing to mock. He should have been able to mock him! Why could he not mock him? Why could he not see the earthling's flaws like he used to? Why did he LIKE what he saw?

Dib's head-crest of black fur, 'hair' as the humans unimaginatively dubbed it, was better kept now. It looked soft though still entertainingly spiky and it was well-groomed and... And... And other good things.

Dib grew into his head, it was no longer disproportionately large, which was a huge disappointment and loss to Zim's teasing inventory. The earthling's features were sharp or soft in all the right places, and he was so expressive, his eyes especially; white, black, and gold-amber eyes that flashed in passion, with dark eye-lashes defining them perfectly.

His hands were neat and deft and precise, trained for working with delicate sciences but strong enough to deliver a bruising punch.

He was very lean. He was fit. He was swift, agile, flexible, strong, clever, and so cursedly confident.

Zim hated him. Hated him. HATED him.

Dib was better now. And Dib seemed to know it. He seemed to think he was so much better now, that Zim was not only literally below him, (in size) but figuratively as well. He'd stopped caring- he had stopped looking at Zim.

How could he? How DARE he?

Zim had always been Dib's obsession. Now he was not. When had that changed? How could it have? That was AWFUL!

Zim watched him through the whole class, just to make sure, because this could not be true. Dib never looked at him.

That could not be! He would force Dib to pay attention to him! It was only right, it was how things were MEANT to be!

At lunch Zim stole Dib's backpack off the seat next to him and ran off with it, intending that Dib would chase and argue with him. Dib didn't even get up. He looked at Zim in simple irritation, so very, very unimpressed.

"Zim, what are you, five? Give it back."

The irken felt his cheeks heat up as he stared back. He opened his mouth to shout and insult but he couldn't find any words. Dib's grimace of distaste made him feel so wretchedly stupid, so embarrassed.

He froze, and then he panicked and caved in. The alien threw it back at Dib before bolting off where he wouldn't hear if people were laughing at him.

He wouldn't give up though. He would not let Dib forget him.

After the next class Zim tried to snag Dib's homework out of his hands while he was reading it and walking down the hall. Finally, they got into a fight.

Dib grabbed at Zim and Zim dodged and jumped away but Dib's hands were catching him, he had to struggle out of his grasp. The human shoved Zim and the alien stumbled back.

Zim should have been screaming at Dib for daring to manhandle him but he couldn't think of what to say. He was silent, and Dib said nothing either.

Dib was so strong now.

Or was Zim so weak? No, that couldn't be. He was amazing! But either way, Dib overpowered him, so what did it even matter to protest or defend his abilities? He was weaker then Dib. Which was horrible.

Dib's smirk was deadly. It really was. It was poison.

For just a flash of a second, during their scuffle of swinging fists, grabbing hands, shoving, and stumbling, as Dib managed corner Zim, he grinned. It was a twitchy, dark, alluring grin, and underneath his wig Zim's antennae drooped in automatic and horrible submission. He froze and lost track of planning his next move.

That hypnotizing grin was short-lived. Dib snatched his homework back and walked away without a word, leaving Zim befuddled, furious, and flustered, scowling down at his empty hands.

Even when he got Dib to pay attention to him he felt horrible. He was always loosing now.

He was...

He was not...

Zim... Zim was not so amazing anymore. He did not feel amazing. No amount of shouting could remedy that.

Dib was better then him. Dib ignored him. Zim had no one else. And that made him nothing. He was nothing. He was alone and small and insignificant and abandoned. He was becoming things no irken should- like lonely, fearful... Desperate.

No.

He would not stand for that! This was all wrong and he was going to fix it! He was Zim!

He was strong! He was a well-trained irken elite! He'd passed all the trials of Hobo 13!

He was strong, strong ENOUGH even. It was just these cursed new FEELINGS! He couldn't concentrate around Dib any more. If he could only concentrate...

But that was easier said then done.

Finding Dib's cameras in his base made his spooch flip over and tingle. He didn't even know if it was a good or bad feeling but it was nerve-wracking and he didn't like it.

It was also nostalgic. Given Dib's attitude Zim doubted he watched any of them anymore. That wasn't even relieving. That made him feel small and ever more insignificant, and sad.

Every day in school blended into the next, all more and more the same.

Zim watched Dib every minute and Dib barely looked at him.

Dib moved like an irken was supposed to, sharp but graceful, calculated, coordinated, on a strait track to his destination. Zim followed Dib down a school hall, looking from the earthling's feet to his own, trying to walk as perfectly as Dib was.

With his longer legs Dib could take larger strides. The farther ahead he got the more Zim rushed and got frustrated until some other disgusting human tripped him and he fell.

People laughed and paused to watch as he pulled himself up with as much dignity as he could muster. Dib had glanced back with a small smirk at Zim's fall but hadn't stopped, and walked on.

Black claws sliced though black gloves and into green palms as the irken tightened his shaking fists.

He felt so ill. So horrible. So angry. Zim wanted to hit and claw and bite everyone. He wanted to scream at obscene volumes and use every curse he knew.

But he just... He lacked... He lacked the energy, the confidence, the passion, that used to fill him to the brim. He didn't dare make such a scene.

He wasn't even mad about being tripped. He hadn't even felt upset until he'd seen Dib smirk and walk on. That scared him. That really scared him. Had he no dignity of his own anymore? Had Dib really become the one and only thing that mattered?

That was sickening.

He had to make this stop!

Zim didn't see Dib outside of school anymore, and so watched him even more obsessively during classes. Pale skin, pink lips, white nails, black hair, bright eyes, dark clothes. Tall, intimidating, immovable... Charming? ... Attractive? Those were the human terms for his liking how Dib looked right?

No. No! Those thoughts were horrible. He could not let them in!

STOP! STOP! STOP!

But those words did seem to be the right ones for what he was feeling.

He could only deny it for so long.

He hated this. He hated this change. He wanted things to go back to how they used to be when everything was perfect and he still felt amazing like he was supposed to!

Zim's eyes were filled with longing, his cheeks darkened as he rested his chin in his hand, just sitting and watching that one specific human.

Days and weeks and a couple months went by and the feelings did not change.

Zim finally came to realize and understand the horrible truth. He was feeling something different towards the Dib. A sense of... Of want. He wanted Dib.

How? What? What did he want from Dib? This made no sense!

But he saw the human couples walking hand in hand as if in ownership of one another, and he saw how some of them would provide shelter and warmth to the other by wrapping their arms around them, and when he saw these things images of Dib came into his mind and his spooch spun and whirled in irrepressible desire and resulting terror and disgust, because THIS. COULD. NOT. BE!

It was only so long before he couldn't deny it any longer. Because out of his growing frustration, he found a solution.

He would have to own Dib. He would have to make the human his in this way. Then at least this feeling of desperation would leave right?

But these feelings got in the way when he fought. He could not overpower Dib physically, he could not fight Dib and defeat him that way and use a physical victory to demand Dib be his, so he would have to use something else, some clever trap, or better yet, he could play at Dib's same game.

He would make himself alluring to the human... He would use the human methods of attraction. It was the obvious answer, was it not?


	2. Chapter 2

Years had passed, and nothing had changed. It was dreary and it was weathering him down. A boy could only stay strong for so long.

When Dib's classmates weren't spiting him they avoided him. He was still the crazy kid, and the bully's punching bag. He had no friends, no one would be caught dead having a civil conversation with him.

He'd be turning eighteen shortly, he was in his senior year of high-school, and he'd never even come close to going on a date, he didn't have friends and never had, people looked at him with grimaces and hurried away or spat insults. He was a freak, a defect, unwanted...

At this rate he was doomed to grow old all alone and entirely unloved... And unnoticed. For all his gusto to play the hero of the world, he'd end up a nobody.

Even his family hated or ignored him. His sister was often abusive and his father was neglectful.

Dib just wanted attention, he wanted POSITIVE attention, he NEEDED it, that desire had driven him for most of his life, but he never, never got it.

That had never changed in all his life. Slowly, little by little, he was giving up. His spirit was crushed. And to top it all off, something absolutely startling was born out of his frustration. Something that caused a terrible change.

He'd always been insatiably fascinated with Zim; he was an alien! He was something entirely new and unknown! Zim was Dib's obsession. he was endlessly intriguing and of course Dib was 'fascinated!'

Then Dib managed to get some new cameras into deeper rooms of Zim's base during one of his little break-ins, and that night one camera got footage of Zim undressing to patch up his uniform. With his unignorable and very physical reaction, Dib was forced to realize that a problem had developed.

He couldn't even deny it and lie to himself. He couldn't say he was just getting thrills from scientific curiosity. He was literally getting extremely aroused from seeing his alien nemesis half-naked.

He should have turned off the screen but he couldn't look away...

It was made worse knowing no human had ever made him feel that way, and Zim hated him and had always been his ENEMY. He really was a freak.

Dib was too ashamed and too awkward to look at Zim for a long while after that.

Then Zim started acting weird himself. He'd seek Dib out to start arguments and fights but he kept... Stopping. Hesitating, was he... Panicking? Something. Something was wrong. Something was upsetting Zim, Dib could tell. Their disputes became jerky, no longer passionate, more rehearsed, strange.

Then even the irken started to avoid him, just like everyone else.

Occasionally Zim would put in some pathetic effort- stealing his backpack or homework trying to get Dib to... To what? What did Zim want? He never spoke and he gave up so easily, as if Dib wasn't even worth it.

He didn't speak to Dib anymore. He didn't even bother to yell at him. Sometimes he'd start to but then cut himself off and, decide to forget it? Oh well. Maybe it was for the better anyway.

Dib liked Zim. Zim was cute. His confidence, his tenacity and persistence, even his voice and laugh and absurd sense of creativity that used to annoy Dib seemed endearing. He liked Zim's funny march, his dark smile when he thought he had victory, the way he gestured around wildly and played with his claws.

It wasn't just his body, it was his everything. Or at least, everything he used to be. Now he was so watered down. He seemed as depressed as Dib did. The human wasn't stupid. He could pick up on it.

But if Zim was so determined to ignore Dib, and not interact with him, fine. If Zim was going to take away his only source of interaction, fine. Dib bitterly decided he'd go back to refusing to even look at Zim, no longer out of shame but out of a sense of betrayal.

Just being around Zim made the human frustrated and irritable now, because his feelings grew so loud yet he knew the irken would never return them. There wasn't even a hope of a chance. Dib was just an ugly, smelly human to Zim.

He tried not to but it was so hard not to fall into bitterness and be mean and bullying towards Zim. That was wrong and he knew it. He didn't want to become like that but little things slipped out anyway, like sneers and even smirking when Zim was tripped in the hall. He hated himself for those things later, but he had no healthy outlets for his feelings and they were going to manifest, one way or another.

Zim could never like a human, Dib assumed. It seemed like simple common sense.

And then Zim walked into school with a different disguise.

It was half-way through the first class when the door slammed open. The irken marched in with all of his old pompous aura and spun into his chair.

Dib sat up strait at attention, eyes wide.

Zim's striped red and black tank top had a very low neckline and the openings for his arms dropped to the bottom of his shorter, inhuman ribcage. His wig was fluffed up and ruffled and just a little bit longer. His black shorts were very short and very tight. His gloves only came to his wrists, and... Of all things, he had those ridiculous running shoes that lit up obnoxiously when he walked. Those shoes. Of course he would have those, especially with an outfit like that. Dib snorted, trying so hard not to laugh and failing.

The combination of the blatantly eye-catching, rather shocking outfit (shocking to see on Zim at least) and the completely out of place and very obnoxious footwear... It described Zim quite well. It was like, the aesthetic of his personality and it was so comic and it pulled Dib right in...

Zim was so awkwardly cute. Damn him. Now the human have to put up with this. Dib got his snickering under control and quickly looked away and out the window. With Zim showing that much skin he wasn't even going to chance looking at him. He'd be staring all day all over again and he didn't trust himself. He knew well how obsessive and compulsive he was by nature. He also knew it was futile to even think of Zim that way, so he wouldn't tempt himself into those thoughts.

But... Wait. Dib's brow furrowed.

Zim had used different disguises for specific plans in the past, but he only ever used the disguises for plans. He never changed his formal wear. His uniform was like a symbol of his pride. The fact that Zim had thrown it off to don 'human ugly animal-hide cloth of filth' without any sign of remorse, was a big red flag.

And what purpose did this outfit serve? He looked... feminine now. Kids were already calling him names and muttering teasing insults but Zim didn't object or argue or yell. He didn't seem to hear them.

Dib didn't dare more then glance at the irken now and then out of suspicion, only when he was sure Zim wouldn't see.

What was he playing at?

Zim started walking different. He wasn't marching now, he was walking, with a sharp yet graceful mannerism that Dib had come to associate with Zim and Irkens, but now there was a little added hip-swish. It was very slight. But Dib knew Zim more then well enough to see it.

Dib didn't dare to stare for too long. He'd jerk his head away whenever Zim looked his way not to be caught.

In lunch Dib took a table across the room from Zim with the sole intent of watching him- something he hadn't done in weeks.

He'd vaguely noticed Zim had been drooped and sad-looking for a while but now the irken sat as tall as he could, alert but forcibly relaxed at the same time, toying with his food and paying little attention to his surroundings. Or was he pretending to pay little attention and actually being very attentive?

Dib wondered for the thousandth time and not for the last, how irken sensory perception might differ from human.

Zim was a wonderland of potential discovery and new things. He was a nebula of bright colors, a dangerous streaking comet, a living creature of fantasy made real.

Dib couldn't bare thought of finding out his secrets by tearing him apart. His old fantasies of discovery through dissection seemed so disturbing and horrific now, he'd cast that idea aside even before seeing Zim in this new light- years ago actually.

But he could never explore Zim the way he really wanted to, physically, emotionally, mentally, through more... Close, experiences.

He had to get the idea out of his head. It was hopeless and its hopelessness was depressing.

Zim could never find a human attractive, let alone love one. The whole idea was ludicrous wasn't it?

Zim sat at his table as if at attention or under inspection, practically posing for some invisible camera, preening his fake hair and new clothes.

Dib was very confused by now. What on earth was Zim doing? Why had he gotten so upset recently but now so... Strange? It made no sense unless... Unless...

After school Zim walked out the doors with his little hip swish, Dib following an inconspicuous distance behind. The irken jumped the steps, ran down the concrete pathway and made quite the acrobatic show of climbing and flipping over the fence. Landing solidly the alien just started walking down the sidewalk, chin up, hands in the pockets of his short shorts looking totally self-satisfied in a forced and showy way.

First provocative new clothes that displayed skin (and Zim never showed skin except his face! He kept EVERYTHING covered!) and now random displays of physical prowess?

He was... He was showing off for someone. And he wasn't trying to look intimidating or powerful, not by these means certainly not! He was... What exactly was he trying to... Surely he couldn't be...

This behavior was so easy yet so painful to read. Zim was copying the most common and obvious human cries for a certain kind of attention.

Unless there was another alien in school that he wasn't aware of, Dib had been wrong about Zim's thoughts on humans.

The earthling had never felt so sick and pained and angry to be wrong, and never in his life had he been so jealous.

He wondered who it was, not that it mattered, what mattered was that someone here, and everyone here bullied him terribly or thought he was insane, one of these horrible monsters had gained Zim's interest while Dib had wasted his time admiring from afar, assuming his chances were inexistent.

The human stood on the school steps staring with wide eyes at the place Zim had vaulted the fence. His shoulders slumped, his face was blanked except for disbelieving hints of despair.

He took a deep slow breath, shoved his hands into the pockets of his own large, flowing trenchcoat, and started walking home. It wasn't like he could do much else.

Was it possible then, that things might have actually gone well if Dib had told Zim he was interested? Had he had a chance all along only to loose it to someone else? Even with this new revelation, Dib laughed wryly at the very thought. Zim had hated him since coming to earth- and not without reason. The irken had also gone out of his way to attack all of Dib's traits, from his personality to his physical appearance. It was beyond clear that he despised everything about the boy.

He'd always acted revolted by all humans but apparently he'd found an exception now.

Who could it possibly be? There was no one in school who was blatantly superior to all the other 'earth monkeys' in ways Dib thought would appeal to an irken. They were all pretty much the same.

How could this happen? How could the irken find one of THEM worthy of dressing up and acting like that?

Not that Dib was under any delusions that 'if anyone deserved Zim's attentions it was him.' No. Far from it.

Dib couldn't say it ought to be him. Oh he very much KNEW that he was smarter then everyone else but from bullying as a kid he'd been convinced he was far from attractive. He and Zim had a terribly violent and hateful history together. He'd really been an ass to the alien.

He was assumed to be crazy, he was obsessive, he had terrible social skills, he was severely attention-needy, and God only knew how many other specific personality flaws he had.

He was junk. He was unwanted and had no value and it seemed his only skill was messing things up. Dib didn't deserve Zim, he didn't think so.

But even still, the fact that he was loosing the one person who'd at least given him attention, to some random person who would either slight Dib or avoid him at all costs, that hurt. That hurt very, very bad.

He'd never get to speak with Zim again, probably. And Zim had always been the ONLY one who'd speak to him, so no matter how much Dib tried not to, and told himself he was being a stupid crybaby, he couldn't completely hold down a few hot, miserable tears.

When he got home Gaz didn't say hello to him, despite sitting on the couch in the front room right where she could totally see him coming in. She was too busy watching what looked like a horror movie.

Dib liked horror movies, but he wasn't in the mood now, and he knew Gaz would want him gone to enjoy it in peace. He couldn't geek out about it to her and right now, if he couldn't talk to her, that seemed to defeat the point. He just wanted someone to talk to.

He sighed, but tried to be quiet about it so he wouldn't bother or distract Gaz and bring about her wrath, and he headed to the kitchen. He hadn't eaten all day.

There was pizza he liked, but Gaz would pummel him if he took it. She pretty much claimed all pizza left-overs.

He grabbed some sort of Chinese dish, a bunch of vegetables, noodles, and chicken in a sauce. It was chilled, and it was supposed to be served warm, but he didn't care enough to warm it. He'd rather just have it cold and let it match how he felt right now. Maybe that was melodramatic but he didn't care. There was no one around to interpret his actions, no one gave a single care.

He needed to talk to someone.

Gaz would either ignore or punch him when he bothered her, his father was always busy and could not be interrupted, and he had no friends... Not really.

The closest thing he had were colleagues. The swollen eyeballs.

Opening his bedroom door the boy looked sullenly at his computer desk.

Even they had come to really dislike him. He'd gotten their hopes up and then lost what proof he'd wanted to show or present way too many times. Many of them thought he was nothing but a troll member who'd joined to waste their time and money. Those who still gave him a chance he bothered too often and they'd eventually cut away from him to keep things more distant and 'just business.' He had too many problems. They didn't want to hear it. They didn't have any interest in his personal life, only his contributions to the group, which remained slim thanks to his terrible luck.

He had no one. He was alone. Even Zim had basically ignored him for quite a while, and now he would definitely completely ignore him- Zim had someone he liked now. He could forget about Dib. Dib was of no consequence to him anymore.

What would Dib do about that? Nothing. What could he do and what would the point be? He just didn't get what he wanted in life and he could only force himself to accept it.

He sat down on his bed to eat his cold food.

His eyes watered and he mentally scolded himself. What right had he to throw himself a stupid pity party? And over what? He didn't deserve Zim at all and he 'knew' that.

He was just so lonely. He could give himself that. Why didn't anyone like him? Why? He knew why. He couldn't feign innocence to that. He had problems, and apparently that made him unlikable.

Unlovable.

Ugly. Freak. Crazy. Impaired. Nutcase. Weirdo. Loser. 'That one kid.' The way they said his very name made it sound like an insult. So many hurtful words used against him so many times. For years and years and years.

He couldn't handle it anymore. It was breaking him down.

Now he'd lost all attention from his enemy, and it was hardly healthy and positive but it was all he had. At least Zim acknowledged him. At least Zim treated him as equal.

But even Zim had lost interest.

He just really wasn't good enough, apparently. He was no good at all.

Dib hated himself.


	3. Chapter 3

Dib wasn't seeing him. Every day Zim tried something new but on the whole he was so limited. Clothing and tricks and movement. That was all he knew of how humans tried to attract each other in the way he thought he was attracted to Dib. That was how they played this game, that was how they 'won' each other. It wasn't working.

He tried different outfits, he made sure they showed as much skin as those of the female humans who always had males flocking around them. He did tricks more blatantly in front of Dib, but the human would AVOID watching him. He tried brighter colors, more colors, he tried wearing glow bracelets all up and down his arms and legs and neck and a crown of them on his head. He tried high-heels; they were too hard to walk in and hurt his feet, but they made him taller and so they were worth it. He tried wearing things that were noisy and chimed and dinged when he moved. Nothing worked. Nothing worked. Nothing worked! Why?! How could Dib still ignore him? Was he just... That uninterested?

But he was Zim! He was amazing!

Or was he not?

His ego was deflating and had already drooped past half-mast by now. He didn't know what to do anymore. He just didn't know. He felt so wretchedly small.

Zim hated going home after school. He hated just being there all alone in the quiet. He spent all his time home eating or watching TV. He was bored to tears, to death, he was physically restless enough to run a marathon but his motivation had bottomed out so that it was hard to even get off the couch.

He started to linger around the school grounds before finally leaving. It wasn't more pleasant then sitting at home but it wasn't QUITE so lonely, even if the departing school children were terrible company. Besides, it gave him more chances to put himself on a pedestal before Dib when the human left.

Days passed into a couple weeks. Two weeks of abominable failure.

He kept trying. If Zim was one thing, it was persistent.

Zim tried putting flowers all over in his hair and the rest of him. They made him sneeze and proved completely unhelpful.

He tried styling his fake hair to copy Dib's, maybe the human would respond to someone with a matching head-fur crest? No, nothing. Maybe if he colored the wig? Red? Purple? No? What about blue? That was Dib's color of choice it would seem. Still, nothing.

The irken tried some especially decorative and sparkly jewelry. One of the classmate humans grabbed him by the necklace and tugged when he was walking down the hall, making him stumble. The irken had no patience left, and no tolerance. His frustration was boiling over. He spun around and slapped the offender across the face, leaving two red trails from his claws across their cheek and then just storming off, leaving them to hold their face and either swear at him or cry. It didn't matter. He didn't care at all.

The jewelry failed. The noisy musical and flashing shoes failed. The glow sticks failed. Low necklines, short shorts, and tight garments failed. Bright colors failed. Dib refused to approach him. Absolutely nothing worked.

This plan had failed. It was a disaster. He was not making any progress and he didn't know what to do. He was caught between insulted rage and dejection.

After school Zim tore off the necklaces, bracelets, armbands and anklets he'd practically coated himself with that morning, breaking every one he could- horrible disgusting tokens of human impracticality they were, all of them. Walking against the traffic Zim stomped around the school to the old playground where they had recess in 'middle school' to sulk.

Dib didn't like going home any more then Zim. Without the irken knowing Dib had adapted his same habit of hanging around school grounds after the bell rang.

Movement caught Zim's eye and he jumped, startled.

On one of the swings sat the human, just sort of rocking back and back and forth in it.

The irken stood tense and tall and strait, his spooch twisting with anxiety, eyes wide, jaw clenched.

Why did seeing Dib send him into this... this... thing? These physical reactions were awful awful awful!

But he wanted... He wanted.

He would win this!

Maybe he didn't need a new approach, maybe he just needed to actually APPROACH. He'd counted on Dib to chase him. Dib had always chased him. That wasn't happening. Maybe if he got right in his face then? How could he ignore him then?

Slowly, to brace himself, Zim drew in a very deep breath, puffed up his chest, and lifted his chin. And he walked over. He could never find words so he wouldn't start anything. Surely it would be easier to let Dib talk and just respond?

He walked up. When he was less then ten feet away, his new furry pink boots with sparkly red sequence crunching on the playground gravel, Dib looked up at him directly. Zim felt a swell of triumph mixed with a swirling panic, but he looked down his non-existent nose at the earthling, and sat down in the swing next to him without a word, as he intended. He kicked his feet at the ground, waiting for the human to say something. Dib was just looking at him, blankly and... Upset. His brows were drawn down a little behind his big glasses, one corner of his mouth did the same. Zim just looked at him expectantly.

"What are you doing?"

Dib asked in a blatant, irritated tone.

Oh good. That was an easy question. It was kind of confusing why he would ask it though, given that the alien was right next to him doing the same thing he was.

"I am sitting on the pendulum play device. Can you not see that?"

Dib's lip curled back jeeringly and Zim had a sinking sensation that he'd done something wrong. The human gestured casually at him.

"No I mean all the stupid, ugly shit you keep dressing up in."

The Irken's face blanked and for just a flash, the hurt he felt was clearly displayed. Dib quickly looked away and did not look back.

Zim agreed honestly. He hated all these clothes. They were impractical and of poor fashion sense, but he was putting up with it for Dib! He was playing the human attraction game! He was doing it the human way! He was performing the human traditions- FOR DIB. Was this all he got for it?

The irken got out of his swing and stood tall, hands shaking and fisted, eyes flashing with brutality. He struck out and fiercely shoved Dib out of his swing before marching off as quick as he could without running in pathetic defeat. He heard Dib yell something short and meaningless but didn't look back. He went strait home to break down in a fit of frustration, breaking everything he got his hands on that he could afford to loose, screaming and ranting at no one in indignation.

That horrible, cursed DIB. How dare he?! HOW DARE HE?! Was he too good for Zim now?! Was that it?! He was tall now so he thought he was just so much better?! That filthy wretch of an earthling!

Zim gave up. He had to. At least for a while. The sting of that final, scornful defeat was too much. Dib couldn't have made it more obvious that he had no attraction and no kindness towards Zim.

The irken went to school the next day in his normal uniform, with no accessories.

Dib went with a weight of guilt in his chest.

Zim's going out of his way to sit beside him under the circumstances had teased him, but that was no excuse. He had to accept that Zim was something he couldn't have and stop being sore about it. There was no reason for him to be cruel towards Zim. Zim had been nice! Dib had gone out of his way to be mean that afternoon. He'd hurt Zim when he could have maybe even talked to him! He needed to talk to someone! He really really needed that! How had he been so stupid!? He wondered if he should apologize but his dignity wouldn't quite let him. The irken would revel in it and rub it in his face and there would be no benefit to it surely?

His obsession from since he was just eleven and his first romantic longing was someone else's now. It was unbelievable. He couldn't just get over it. The idea was so dreadful he felt he'd break down. But he couldn't do anything about it. He told himself he was just being stupid and unreasonable. It didn't stop his feelings.

Who was it? That was something Dib couldn't quite figure out. He'd look around when Zim went showing off with his stunning agility and speed, but he had yet to see one specific person who would be there every time.

It was hard not to fantasize something very violent happening to this unknown person. But he knew that was wrong of him. He refused to entertain such ideas. He didn't want to be one of THOSE guys.

The alien hadn't hatched a new plan in a long time, he was hardly a threat to earth and despite his recent attitude born out of deprivation, Dib did not hate Zim. He admired him. He knew things weren't well between Zim and the rest of the irken species. That had been made clear a number of times from the very beginning.

They were both two neglected, unwanted misfits. At least one of them deserved to be happy.

Dib felt he ought to let Zim have his happiness uninterrupted but it was so upsetting...

When Dib glanced at Zim now and then the next day when he couldn't resist the pull, Zim didn't look happy at all. He looked utterly depressed. He wasn't marching or even walking now. He was dragging his feet, posture drooped. He looked defeated.

Rejected?

Who the hell dared to reject Zim?!

Now Dib really wanted to beat up this mystery person.

For a moment in lunch he considered trying to talk to Zim, even apologize, he really wanted to apologize, and he really needed to talk, to just interact, with someone, anyone, but he held back. He stared for five minutes or more strait, his lunch getting cold on its tray, but Zim didn't notice, didn't look at him. Zim didn't look up from his tray, poking at the mushy food with a spork, his expression a permanent, detached frown.

The feeling of guilt and regret only grew. Dib HAD to talk to Zim. He would! Right after school today! He had to. He had to apologize. Zim was upset with him and he hadn't meant to hurt him...

But the irken was one of the first people out the doors after the bell and he went strait home. Dib stayed trying to find Zim, but when everyone had left and the grounds were deserted, there was nothing left for him but to go home without any resolution and deal with his self-loathing.

A storm rolled in that evening. The rain was pouring against the roof when Dib heard the doorbell ring. He figured they might go away, in that particular moment he really prayed they would go away. He was in the middle of something. But the bell started ringing frantically and someone began pounding on the door at the same time, and Gaz yelled from her room, demanding he answer the person.

Their dad wasn't home, as usual. It was left to him.

After a minute Dib hurried downstairs, the sleeves of his shirt pulled down and clutched in his hands to cover his wrists, his eyes puffy and red and tracks from a certain salty liquid he hurriedly wiped away, as he grabbed the door-handle and yanked it open.

The sickly-sweet stench of singed irken assaulted his nose. A three-clawed hand grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him down to the alien's level.

"Get. Zim. A towel."

Dib didn't need the invader to hiss his demand through clenched teeth a second time. He didn't even question why on earth Zim was there, he just muttered something along the lines of, "Oh, uh, Zim! Uhm, right, okay, yeah, towel," and he bolted up the stairs with the vigor of a frightened rabbit to fetch the requested item.

The human came back down with three massive towels draped over one arm, and approached Zim as if the alien might lurch and bite him at the slightest provocation.

Leaned against the couch with his jaw clenched in pain, the smoking irken looked up at the human's offering and lost some of the hostility he'd entered the house with, though of course he did not thank Dib.

"You got caught in the rain huh?" Dib asked conversationally, looking at the several wet shopping bags beside the Irken's feet.

"I thought Gir did your shopping."

"Yes, well, Gir is no longer... Functioning. At least not for now." Zim growled, desperately trying to dry himself off.

Seeing Dib's uncertain look, Zim grumbled and clarified, "Gir is kind of dead now."

"O-oh!"

Dib stuttered in shock, then, "I-I'm... Sorry to hear that... Uhm... Wow..."

Gir?! Dib had thought that little thing was indestructible!

Zim shrugged. He didn't answer but his expression pinched at the topic.

Well! Dib was behaving more pleasantly now! Too bad it was spoiled by Zim being too angry with him to feel the jubilation he might have felt before. However he wasn't as shy and hesitant as he would have been then either. Amazing how some rage could bring back his confidence!

This towel was not working.

Zim looked down at his dripping uniform and pants, both clinging to his body, sopping wet, actively burning him, and he sighed heavily.

"Get me some of your awful smelly earth clothes and dry these for me."

For just a moment Dib looked offended at Zim's tone, but that didn't last.

"Uh, okay."

This was almost enjoyable. Dib's mood swing between yesterday and now was badly confusing Zim though.

Irkens had far less of a sense of modesty then humans, but Zim had figured out with his previous tries to get Dib's attention, that showing skin in front of someone was a sign of intimacy and an alluring thing. Zim still held too much of a grudge to allow Dib the privilege of seeing that, and so he put up with the burning a little longer to get to the bathroom to change.

At least the human did everything he was asked to. Even if it was probably out of PITY, a disgusting thought, Zim was happy to have it right now. He demanded comfortable clothes and Dib went right off to get them. The human brought Zim some of his own pajama pants and a sleeveless, cotton shirt- the only thing he had in red, apparently. Both were very big on Zim. While he didn't mind the shirt slipping to show one shoulder constantly, the way the pants kept falling down and pooling around his feet was very annoying.

Also his wig had to be taken off and left next to a running fan to dry out. His antennas felt numb and sore and he couldn't smell or hear quite so well until that went away, making him paranoid.

He could still smell at least a little though.

The clothes were full of Dib's smell. Even after getting so mad at him yesterday this still made Zim's spooch churn with that strange, desperate longing.

The alien looked at the bathroom door, as if the cursed earthling might have snuck in by him, then he lifted the shirt and pressed his antennae to the fabric. It was such an odd, primitive thing. It shouldn't make him feel so good and so happy. He was an irken! It was wrong but there was something about it that had made him stop fighting it. It was too potentially enjoyable to deny.

Someone knocked on the door and Zim jumped and whipped around.

"Hey, do you want some socks too?" Dib called in.

Zim looked at his irken socks, which were sitting on the counter by the little fan, along with his wig, boots, and gloves. Human socks wouldn't have leathery padding in the toes and his claws would probably get stuck in them.

"No."

He didn't think anything too bad could come of letting Dib see his feet.

He stepped out and was surprised to see the human standing idly right outside the door, waiting for him. Zim stared back as Dib looked him over, wondering what he might demand in exchange for using his house as shelter, but the human just pointed at the pajama pants.

"I think you need a belt or something."

"Obviously! I cannot even walk!" Zim snapped, picking up one leg. "They are swallowing my feet."

Dib smiled, not in a mean way this time, and tried not to laugh.

"That's easy to fix actually."

Zim was about to yell that it wasn't easy for HIM because he didn't know what to do about it, but Dib knelt in front of him, and the servile display shocked him into silence.

"I'll show you, watch."

Zim held very still, aside from a reflexive twitch when Dib first grabbed the cuff of one pants-leg. The human rolled them up neatly and quickly to above the alien's ankles. Standing up, Dib pushed his glasses up against the bridge of his nose.

"Better?"

Zim looked down at his feet.

"No. They're uneven. Fix it."

Dib scoffed. "I'm not fixing it! You can fix it! They're totally even anyway!"

"No they aren't! Make them even!" Zim pointed demandingly down at his feet, eyes narrowed, one hand holding up the waistband of his pants. Dib made an exasperated noise but he hardly even looked upset, just amused.

"How about I get you a belt instead?"

Zim thought about that, then nodded and waved Dib away.

"Yes, okay, good, you do that."

The pants had no belt loops, but Zim's waist was small enough that Dib could tie the ends of a folded bandana and use that.

Zim was just happy to be dry, though he questioned Dib several times about why he always wore 'dumb, stupid, loose, baggy pants' all the time, and why he had nothing 'better' to offer.

"Like what? Tights?" Dib raised an eyebrow at Zim, making sure the tied bandana would hold, while the irken tried not to look too horribly startled or flattered by all this unexpected treatment.

"Ehhh, no, Well actually, hm, I don't know how you would look in tights."

Dib snickered and Zim looked at him with one eye narrowed, wondering what was so funny and also what Dib's legs looked like. Dib always kept his arms and legs pretty well-covered and never wore form-fitting pants. It was a tempting curiosity for some reason.

Dib stepped back, unable to resist a moment of admiration. Zim was so cute. He looked so descriptively fragile- that was probably an insectoid thing, Dib had figured. Irkens had very compact muscles... And completely flawless skin, Zim was such a pretty lime-green. Oh, and there were his antennas, sticking out behind his head and just a little raised, a casual-active position, the paranormal investigator had figured out. Those feelers were PARTICULARLY cute and so fascinating...

"Why are you staring at me?" Zim shouted, feeling that same, strange, nervous fluttering in his chest as Dib had gone so quiet and started to stare with such an unreadable expression.

Dib's face reddened and he quickly turned away.

"N-nothing! I-no-I mean Uhm, n-nevermind. It's nothing, just, nevermind."

Dib scoured his mind for something to change the subject to- and something to keep Zim here instead of asking for an umbrella and walking out.

"Do you want a snack?"

That was the magic word! Zim's antennas snapped up to what Dib knew as the 'happy position.'

"Yes!"

Dib let Zim go through the kitchen cupboards and only pointed out what he personally thought was good or bad. Zim smelled each container with his twitching feelers after looking it over, and discarded item after item with varying looks of disgust.

Eventually he settled on animal crackers, some cold pasta salad in the fridge, chips, and marshmallow spread.

Dib raised his eyebrows but didn't say anything. Assuming correctly that Zim would not be sharing anything, he got himself his own bag of chips, and they sat down on the couch in the front room.

Zim started flipping through the channels and it got very quiet between them. It was... strange, but somehow not as awkward as it seemed like it ought to be?

Then that nasty feeling of guilt started to boil up and prod at Dib. He looked at Zim. He tried to think of something to talk about to change the subject. He didn't want to bring that up now! Everything had been going so well!

But he really needed to didn't he? It couldn't make things go downhill could it? He was just going to get it off his chest and over with.

"Hey, uhm, Zim?"

The irken didn't look away from the TV and his cheeks were stuffed with animal crackers as he bit off the legs of another.

"Hmn?"

"I'm- I- I'm sorry I was rude to you yesterday."

Zim looked up now, observant but pensive, and waiting for something more.

Dib swallowed and stared down at the couch cushions, hunching his shoulders.

"I've said worse to you before without you getting so upset-" He started to defend himself but quickly stopped, knowing that wouldn't help at all.

"But I wasn't joking about it or anything, I DID choose to be mean to you, on purpose, for no good reason at all and it was stupid and horrible of me and I didn't really mean it and I'm sorry."

Zim lit up with a horrendously smug smile, leaning back into the couch. Dib braced himself for some jeering, superior response, regretting this decision, but Zim just said, "Good."

And that was the end of that, basically.

"Why have you been so moody and ignoring Zim lately?" The alien dug for needed answers, and Dib shrugged, startled to learn Zim had noticed and... Missed it? Maybe?

"I dunno." Dib answered in a small voice, eyes drawn to nature documentary now on TV.

"I... Figured... I guess I thought I was annoying you or... I didn't want to get in your way? You hadn't made any plans to stop. I don't know. I'm tired of always feeling like I'm bothering people so I just back off. I suppose I've been doing that a lot lately."

Zim raised his hairless eyebrows incredulously.

"Impossible. The Dib loves attention far too much for that! Who are you ranting to then? The Gaz?"

"No." Dib sighed. "No one."

Zim looked shocked. Dib just continued irritably.

"Everyone always just seems annoyed by me and I'm tired of feeling like a bother so I just leave them all alone. It drives me nuts and makes me miserable but I feel less unwanted alone then I do around people."

"That is really sad, and by that Zim means pathetic."

Dib glared at him. "Gee, thanks for the sympathy."

"I didn't give you any. But as Zim was saying, that is absolutely pathetic. You are a particularly superior human and their treatment of you, as you are superior, is appalling. How can earthlings make evolutionary progress if they run their best specimens into the ground like this? You really should have let me kill them all."

Dib had not been expecting that. Well, maybe that last statement was pretty typical of the irken but the rest... The rest...

"...Th-thank you?" He stuttered, then paused, then, very hesitantly looked up at Zim to question him.

"How do you think I'm 'superior' or whatever?"

Zim scoffed. "Is it not obvious? Surely you are already aware?"

Dib shook his head, looking at the invader with vaguely hopeful curiosity. Zim rolled his eyes as if annoyed that Dib did not know this and started answering.

"Well you're way smarter then them,"

Dib had always known that much, but it felt good to have that clarified by someone else.

"And you bother to clean yourself so you do not stink so bad,"

Dib had not considered that one. Zim didn't think he stunk? Or at least not bad? That was a change!

"You're in very good physical condition, at least for a human, you have been able to mostly match Zim in skills and that is impressive,"

Why had he never given himself THAT credit? Dib was shocked to think back to the scale of their old battles and everything he'd gone through and survived physically and realized he'd never once thought to feel proud of that, at least not in a long time.

"And you have been able to match Zim in battle without having to blow up your muscles like balloons like some humans- that's really gross."

Dib snickered. To such a thin, compact creature he supposed the muscle thing WOULD be weird.

"And you're DEFINITELY not so ugly like most other humans."

Woaaah, back up! What? Did he really say that? It wasn't like he'd said Dib looked GOOD even, but just to know that looks-wise he was better then the rest, all of whom had told him he looked like a weirdo, if he was better, even by a little, and Zim of all people thought so...

"R-Really?"

"What?"

"That last thing."

Dib ran his hand up through his hair in a nervous habit and Zim's contact-covered eyes were drawn to follow the motion.

"Oh, er, yes, of course, you are not at all as ugly as the average human."

The alien looked away, pretending to be distracted by the screen.

That was a legitimate compliment coming from Zim!

Dib beamed, and looked away feeling sappy but he was just so happy. It was so so so nice to be complimented and approved of, even minimally, anything, he'd take anything at all and Zim had given him a little list!

"Thank you." Dib mumbled.

"Yes you said that already- Why are your cheeks all red?!"

Dib's eyes went wide and his hands flew up to feel or cover his face.

"They are?"

"Yes. I think it's getting worse and spreading into your ears and the back of your neck."

Zim scooted further away from Dib on the couch, defensively. "Maybe you need some sort of medicine for that?"

Dib shook his head, avoiding eye contact with Zim's prying, anxious gaze.

"No, it's just a... 'Stupid human reaction' I guess."

"Your face changing color is a natural reaction?"

"Yeah."

"To what?"

"Uhm, I guess you complimenting me?"

"Oh, yes, I suppose you would not be used to that and I am amazing so I can see how it would trigger such a strong-seeming reaction."

Dib snorted and pushed Zim's hand away when the irken tried to poke his cheek and see if it felt any different.

"OH NO!"

Zim leapt up, staring at a nearby window that looked out onto the sidewalk, his hands up covering his head.

"What is it?" Dib asked after a startled pause, confused and concerned.

"There are humans out there! Humans who will see Zim like this through your cursed windows!"

He had his contacts in still but his wig was drying in the bathroom.

The human looked out the window. It was dark, raining heavily, thundering, and lightning.

"... I will be very, very genuinely surprised if there's anyone out in this weather, let alone someone poking around in my yard, Zim."

"I don't care! We are going somewhere else."

"You know I can just close the curtains right?"

"No lets go somewhere else. I want to see your room!"

"What?" Dib squeaked, eyes going wide. "No! I haven't had time to clean it! I haven't re-organized my stuff in ages and its all messy and you'll hate it!"

"Perfect! Let me see how you keep it to live in! Zim wants to see!" The irken grinned tauntingly.

Dib moaned. "No! You'll complain it's all dirty and smelly!"

Zim was already going up the stairs, leaving the TV on and the food he had yet to eat all over the coffee table. Dib finally got up and followed with a noise of acute displeasure.

The human's room was dark, and full of his alluring yet sharp personal scent. It had a heavy impression of sadness and anger related hormones though. Zim worried about that, and his antennas drooped just slightly at that smell.

The bed was unmade and used clothes were left on the floor. Dib rushed in after Zim to kick a couple pairs of boxers away into his closet.

The human's computer was impressive looking. He'd added onto it since he was a kid, but it was still covered in sci-fi stickers from earlier times.

The posters on the walls hadn't changed much in the last three years. They were full of conspiracy theories, cryptozoology, aliens, ghosts, zombies, bigfoots, chupacabras, etc. All of which Zim would have expected- oh wait, that picture of a cartoon human holding onto the edge of a flying saucer with the words 'hang in there' was new. Heheh, funny, because if he let go he'd die. That was a good joke Zim supposed.

There were lots of little relics and field-research-samples Dib had collected over the years, supposedly from paranormal creatures; ghost ooze, a strange footprint, a preserved, three headed mouse with strange spinal growths floated dead in a jar of chemicals.

He had a work table. The surface and containers of pins and knives said it had been used or at least intended for dissections but now it was covered in tamer things, like papers, journals, records, books, and newsclippings.

Dib's passions were knowing the unknown and looking into what had been discarded as false. He didn't care as much about educating and protecting others and being the hero anymore though. He'd been pushed away too often, and if they wanted to be left to die, so be it, he thought.

"Ugh, it's all messy and disorganized." Zim critiqued, smirking as the human rushed to take care of just that.

"I warned you." Dib grumbled, leaning down to pick up a shirt and flinching as Zim jumped nimbly over his head.

The clock on the wall said it was ten forty-seven.

"Are you, uh..." Dib hesitated, hopefully.

"How long are you planning on staying?"

"Zim will stay until this rain is over."

"Oh." Dib tried not to sound disappointed. Zim would stay only as long as it was useful and convenient in other words. Oh well. He was being very good company and Dib wasn't lonely for now. That was worth a lot.

Like some cruel joke of fate, the rain stopped within the next ten minutes. Dib had been passionately explaining, on Zim's bored prompting, what a vampire was, and amazingly, Zim did not interrupt immediately but waited until he had finished his train of thought before cutting him off.

"Alright well, Zim will be going home now."

Dib's lost his previous excited spark. "Oh, okay, yeah, I'll see you at school tomorrow then?"

"Of course."

Zim took his dried clothes and his shopping bags of food and random hardware bits and left. He did not bother to change so he went home wearing Dib's pajamas and his own boots, without bothering to ask if the human would mind. Dib did not.

After Zim was gone, Dib went to bed, but it wasn't out of depression. For the first time in a long while he felt content. He needed someone he could just spend time with. Zim had always given him that. Zim had given him that just now.

For the moment at least, he could forget that Zim was someone else's now, and be happy.


	4. Chapter 4

Zim held his head up and marched through the cracked and stained halls with sun-shining confidence, walking strait, not moving aside for anyone, his ego swelled back to its usual state.

Dib saw him and actually looked at him, actually smiled, and actually waved. Zim grinned and waved back.

But Dib's smile was just a little too forced and his scent had that bitterness filtering back in.

Zim internally sighed and rolled his eyes after walking past, but his irritation was partly born out of pity. Was the human so entrenched in misery that he couldn't stay happy for just twenty-four hours? He'd been happy when Zim had been with him last night!

He'd been happy with Zim. He'd been nice to Zim, even catered to him! And Zim had his attention now!

At last! He was making progress! Zim could win this yet!

The irken looked happy, Dib noticed. And just yesterday he'd looked so sad and... and rejected. The human wondered if Zim had worked out whatever had upset him with his... Boyfriend? Girlfriend? Was Zim physically even male? Did aliens have a concept of sexuality? Was Zim totally different 'down there?' Did it even matter?

But Zim noticed HIM, and he smiled and waved at HIM, and Dib was compelled to return the gesture. He felt a little better after he did. At least he had some of Zim's attention. Maybe, maybe he wouldn't be forced to give Zim up entirely?

The day went quietly. Dib waited by the steps after school but he didn't see Zim, so he had to go home lonely and wish that maybe tomorrow they could hang out and talk, at least just a little, just a few minutes between classes or before going home?

The phone rang shortly after he got home. Dib ignored it to go to the messaging machine and started for the stairs, but when Zim's voice called out from said machine, demanding he pick up the phone because the irken was sure he was home by now, Dib practically tripped down the stairs and raced back to the phone like a bat out of hell.

"Zim?" That was the most the boy could manage for a hello.

"YES I AM ZIM!" The alien screamed into the other end, making Dib wince. "I am calling you on this primitive device to let you know I am coming over to your house, again, like I did last night. So, you have fair-warning to clean things and make them presentable for me this time, yes?"

Zim wanted to come over just to come over? Like, to hang out? With him?!

"W-why do you want to... To come over here?" Dib stuttered dumbly, regretting the words immediately after they left his mouth, why question a good thing? But he really had to ask. He was so puzzled.

"Entertainment." Zim answered after a short hesitation, his tone flat and vague.

Dib was confused. Zim wanted to come to his house? For fun? Did he really have nothing better to do?

Dib's jealousy picked the worst time to slip into mind and he asked one last question, against his own better judgement.

"Why would you come to MY house though? I mean, you wouldn't rather hang out with your crush or whatever?"

"My what?"

"You know what I mean, whoever you've been showing off for trying to get their attention."

There was a very long, uncomfortable pause. Dib wondered if he'd upset Zim again, feeling a thick, growing regret in his stomach, but he didn't think he had really upset him. He had asked it as a genuine question, it wasn't meant to be mean. If anything at all it was self-depreciating. Why would Zim want to come be with him?

"This is some sort of human sarcasm joke I assume? right?" Zim's voice was absolutely dripping with... Something. Dib wasn't sure what. Disbelief and something else that made Dib feel he'd missed out on something infinitely huge and obvious. He was quiet for a minute, wondering how to respond.

"Kidding about what?"

Another pause. Dib was now realizing he'd done something bad but he didn't know what. Then Zim started screaming.

"YOU IDIOT PIG-COW! HOW CAN YOU NOT FIGURE THIS OUT?! YOU'RE WAY TOO OBSERVANT AND YOU ARE NOT THIS STUPID! DON'T YOU DARE PLAY GAMES WITH ZIM! HAVE YOU REALLY NOT KNOWN?! THIS WHOLE TIME YOU THOUGHT ZIM WAS DOING ALL THIS STUPID JUNK FOR SOME RANDOM, DISGUSTING, PRIMITIVE, [u]AVERAGE[/u] HUMAN?! IS THAT IT?! YOU DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE- OH YOU ROTTEN-"

Zim said a lot more but Dib tuned out as the puzzle piece clicked into place. He didn't dare believe it at first. He couldn't mean that! Surely not! Dib didn't get nice things like this, that wasn't how his life worked, and he DID NOT DESERVE ZIM. He'd been a bully to him so many times and Zim had made it obvious that he thought of Dib as inferior, but Zim's shrieking seemed to make it so... Almost clear.

"Y-y-you mean- ME?" Dib squeaked, unable to get out any better words, paralyzed with the fear of being wrong and getting laughed at for even daring to hope.

"YES YOU, YOU HORRIBLE, UNBEARABLE, WRETCHED EARTH MONKEY! ZIM HAS BEEN THROUGH EARTH-HELL TRYING TO INITIATE HUMAN COURTING WITH YOU AND YOU HAVE IGNORED ZIM THE WHOLE TIME! I'M COMING TO YOUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW AND YOU'D BETTER HAVE LOTS OF SNACKS OUT FOR ME!"

Zim slammed down the phone and Dib heard the bang before the hang-up click.

He stood completely still in shock and revelation for what felt like a very, very long time.

It couldn't be. This was just a dream, for certain, and he'd wake up and be horribly, horribly depressed and disappointed and he should stop kidding himself-

But this was no dream. He knew what Zim had said. This was LITERALLY everything he hadn't dared to even hope for.

He had been that one person who was there when Zim had gone showing off- that was why he hasn't seen any one person there every time- it was him that Zim checked for, it was him Zim wanted to be seen by.

The other day when he'd looked so rejected had been when Dib made fun of his efforts! Zim felt Dib had rejected him- and he'd... He'd been so upset about it... Oh man alive, he'd been such an ASS!

Zim had been happy today, maybe because Dib had apologized and they'd been getting along so well?

He'd made Zim happy? He was the one Zim had noticed? All this time of silent admiration and boiling jealousy and Zim had wanted him back?

It was several minutes before he remembered Zim's last request/warning and he ran to the kitchen, scrambling to make sure there were indeed plenty of snacks set out for Zim. After that he bolted for the bathroom to make himself look as nice, or at least as well-groomed, as was possible in what little time he had.

When the alien arrived he slammed the front door open without knocking, obviously seething, and went strait for Dib's peace offering on the kitchen table, with the human scrambling after him, stuttering endless apologies through jubilant, shaky laughter so he was barely comprehensible.

Zim was placated with the assortment of sweets and other junk foods, the tension melting off his face to a more neutral expression, and claimed a couple boxes of cookies in a show of superior dignity before he would even look at Dib. He could only hold his gaze for a few seconds before looking away sheepishly.

Dib was stunned. Did ZIM feel awkward? Maybe he felt strange for having had to confess directly? Was that shameful for an irken? Now Dib felt even worse.

"Alright so, you have accepted Zim, of course, now that I have made myself as clear as possible?"

Zim's tone made it a judgmental statement, but it was a question, and he waited anxiously for Dib's answer, looking at him with poorly concealed pleading and frustration and desperation.

"Well- YEAH!" Dib blurted awkwardly, not knowing any more elegant way to answer. Zim didn't mind. He lit up, grinning so all his teeth showed.

"Excellent! Then you are Zim's, eh, thingy, now. Belonging to Zim alone, in that way."

The strangely worded, possessive announcement made Dib feel much too happy, and praised, it gave him such a sense of belonging that he'd never known before.

He looked away, his smile shy, that complimented blush rushing to his cheeks again.

"Yeah, sure."

"VICTORY!"

Zim threw his hands in the air, grinning maniacally. Startled, Dib jumped and caught himself half falling off his chair. After their years of battles, even if that had slowed to a halt, Zim's exclamation didn't sound good to Dib.

"Victory over what?" He asked, trying to get back into his seat.

Zim paused at the question, caught off guard without an answer, but then he shrugged and waved it off, responding, "Victory over this whole thingy! The attraction game getting you to belong to me thingy! And over you specifically!"

"Victory over me?" Dib raised his eyebrows. Zim grinned again in a darker way that made the human shiver in apprehension and something else.

"Yes! I own you now!" Zim lifted his chin, trying to give the impression he was looking down on the taller being.

"I'm not your slave!" Dib quickly informed the alien, to clear up any possible misunderstanding. Zim just shrugged and made an ambiguous, grunting sort of noise, waving it off.

"Close enough."

Dib didn't care how Zim thought of it right now, not really. This was... He was happy. He was at a loss for how to respond, he just kept staring at Zim.

Dib sat in a chair at the kitchen table beside Zim- but not too close, as if afraid he might do something that would cause Zim to take it all back in an instant and walk out.

He rested his chin in one hand, his elbow braced on the table.

"So you... You actually like me?" The human's voice squeaked with anxious hope and disbelief that made Zim smirk.

"Yes of course. I have told you this. I am still very angry that I went through so much and you never figured it out!"

"Sorry." Dib hunched his shoulders and lowered his gaze at Zim's glare, but his excited smile stayed.

"And you like Zim, of course." The irken 'announced.'

"Because, I am Zim... And also you would not have accepted my proposal if you did not reciprocate Zim's icky feelings?" It was said as a statement to mask the nervousness of the question.

Icky? Dib smirked. At least he was right in assuming this wasn't something that came naturally to Zim, the irken had to come to terms with it.

"Of course!" Perhaps his wording was too much of a stroke to Zim's ego, but the alien did look pleased and maybe even flattered, so Dib found he couldn't worry about it too much, as long as it made Zim happy.

"Alright! Well then!" Zim stood abruptly from his chair.

"I need to go home now."

"What?" Dib cried, scrambling up after Zim as he was already heading for the door.

"But-but you just got here! You can't just walk out after, after THAT!"

"I took care of what I needed to." Zim answered flatly, stopping only as he grabbed the doorknob.

"Now there are some very important things I need to take care of at home!"

Dib's look of dismay made Zim feel giddy. Apparently his presence was very appreciated.

"Don't fret so much human. I'm not going to abandon you eternally! Zim will be seeing you again very soon!" He grinned, and with that he was out the door.

In truth, Zim hadn't planned ahead enough to know what to do with Dib now that he'd secured him as his own in this way. He had research to do. These feelings were linked to psychological needs satisfied by social rituals the Dib would probably be expecting of him- Zim hoped they weren't disgusting! But that was about all he knew... That and the fact that Irkens were NOT supposed to have these phycological needs, however he'd dealt with that a while ago, when the feelings had first come on. Some suppressor in his pak was damaged and there wasn't much he could do about it. If he couldn't fix himself, he would have victory over this.

And now he had victory.

Victory, oh sweet victory! Zim felt as if all his stress had melted off. He had secured Dib- and the human was willing! Dib had surrendered! Or, no, not surrendered. This was supposed to be some sort of mutually beneficial thing? They would help provide each other with necessities and protection from danger and various comforts. That was why humans had evolved these relationships right? An aid to easier survival? Easier, comfier living in general? Sounded nice, nice enough to make up for having this human become emotionally dependent on him.

Would this make him dependent on Dib? He already was to some degree, wasn't that what had started this? It was infuriating but at least the dependency would go both ways. That was satisfying.

Zim's steady, metallically-clicking footfalls kept a leisurely, even pace as he walked strait down the sidewalk, parting for no one and lost in his strategic musings, heading back to his base.

The human had been sad to see him go last time, and even more upset this time. The Dib was indeed most pleasantly surprised by all this. Zim could just smell the disbelief and joy and excitement oozing off the earthling on learning that Zim was demanding they have this type of bond.

Had he really thought Zim might go after some other human? That was just offensive! Or maybe he'd thought the problem was him? Had he not thought himself good enough? That justified it to some degree, but had Dib really thought that he was SO not good enough that Zim would latch onto some filthy, primitive, AVERAGE HUMAN before Zim would choose him? Did he not realize his superiority to all the others in every way? That was sad. Poor creature. The other earthlings DID treat him like dirt.

Well, Zim would have to remedy that!

As his... Bonded... Thingy, obviously Zim was superior and Dib ought to be immensely flattered that Zim had chosen him but... Zim would try to treat him in a way that would boost his self-worth; it would be necessary to get Dib back up to anything even resembling the confidence of his childhood... The attitudes the other humans held towards Dib had really made the earthling wither over time. The way he'd stared so wide eyed, and how his face had gone red at Zim's flatteries, announcing his superiorities... It was 'cute,' but it made clear that Dib didn't think of himself as anything special. Zim would not have any interest in something that wasn't special so this was an insult to him... But it made the human humble, perhaps?

Maybe once he had more ideas of what one was supposed to do with the other in a relationship he could enjoy watching the human explode with shock at being treated so well by such an amazing creature as Zim was! Because of course, he would be a far superior partner to anything Dib could ever have dreamed of, because he was Zim.

...

He really, really hoped he could at least perform the human courting rituals adequately for Dib. What if they were difficult? What if... What if they required human THINGS! Like hair on your head or ears or noses or five-fingered hands?

What would he do?

For now, research- that was what he would do. He needed to have a game plan for what to do next.

Zim had intended to come back sooner, maybe that same evening, after a bit of study, but now that his desperation had been resolved he had a clear head, and he realized when he came home, just how badly his base had fallen into disrepair. He couldn't leave it like that. Then after several hours of cleaning up snack wrappers and sweeping and dusting and scrubbing, he'd forgotten what he'd been planning to do, and ended up watching TV.

He didn't remember his plans and promise until he saw Dib at school the next day, and so when he smiled at the earthling in passing down the hall, it was a mildly awkward expression.

Dib just beamed back at him.

Well, research or no research, he could stop by the earthling's house today anyway. It seemed likely that would make Dib happy, and, strange as the idea was, Zim felt he'd be happy to see Dib again in a non-school setting as well. He felt he would be happy to see Dib happy.

Dib was his now.

... He didn't like how close other humans got to him in the crowded halls. And that was saying something because they all avoided Dib. They were still too close.

Zim and Dib had always been the loser weirdos, now, as the loser weirdo duo, they were given even more space.

Zim startled Dib as he came up right beside him to walk to class, their shoulders bumping. For just a moment Dib had the instinctive pull to step away. He wasn't used to his space being invaded. But it was Zim, he saw. He wanted his space invaded by Zim, so he kept walking strait.

The human sent Zim a small smile, and the irken acknowledged it, but his own expression was overly dignified, his chin up in the air. Dib fought to keep from snickering.

Zim looked very proud to be escorting him around school. Dib made no complaints whatsoever despite how often the irken bumped him or seemed to be herding him sideways into the lockers domineeringly.

"So what was so important that you had to run home yesterday?" Dib questioned casually, concealing his curiosity as well as his irritation that something had cut their time together then so short.

Zim made a thinking sort of 'nnnn' noise, then answered, "Something," narrowing his eyes.

Dib snorted but didn't persist. He was too worried that he'd talk too much, like he always did when he was a kid; he was too scared of annoying Zim and becoming a bother so he didn't dare keep questioning him.

What sorts of things did human couples do when walking together? Zim scrambled through the contents of his brain for any helpful information. What could he do, right now, to show to the other human filth-pigs that Dib was taken, and also, to begin strengthening Dib's attachment to him?

Oh! Oh! He knew one! One would grab the other's hand and drag them by it like a leash! That showed dominance and ownership but it was also one of these relationship things, because the person in charge guided the other! Perfect!

Zim looked down as they walked nearly hip to hip, and grabbed Dib's hand in his own smaller one with a boa-constrictor grip.

Dib startled, looking at his hand wide-eyed at the perceived attack, only to look even more shocked when he realized this was not an attack at all. His face went red and he looked away, unable to stop smiling.

Zim observed his reaction and smirked. His smirk turned into a grin as Dib squeezed his hand back briefly, his fingers curled around the Irken's hand in willingness that Zim thought completed the ritual.

Success! Oh irk this was going so well!

They had to let go when they got to the classroom, and Zim did, begrudgingly. The look of joy and thanks Dib gave him before walking in towards his desk seemed to make up for it.

He was winning, Zim thought. In no time at all the human would be irrevocably attached to him and unable to even consider breaking away for any reason!


	5. Chapter 5

Zim did not visit Dib that night. He had to do research. He had to make sure he knew what he was doing.

That didn't get very far. The irken got caught up in cleaning and TV and snacks yet again, but he did manage to look up a few things- the two most common human signs of affection.

Dib seemed happy enough just to have Zim around, and the alien knew it was important for them to just spend time together and 'hang out,' as earthlings said. It would be best for him to pay Dib another visit, as soon as he could. And so he did.

The next day was a Friday, but a teacher meeting of some sort had been scheduled, and school was off for that day, leaving the students with a three day weekend but a wheelbarrow of homework to make up the deficit.

Zim thought he might give the human clothes one more shot and see if they had an effect now that he already had Dib's attention to some extent.

The sleeveless red and black striped shirt was comfy and looked decent.

While changing Zim paused for a moment, remembering the T-shirt and baggy sweat-pants he'd gotten from Dib. He hadn't worn them since getting home and changing into clean irken-wear, but, now that he thought about it, it was tempting.

While the other human clothes were tolerable or a-little-comfortable-I-guess at best, Dib's clothes had been actually enjoyable. The fabric was soft and warm and it was saturated in Dib's scent, and it was a GIFT from his human! His human had given him clothes! Was that not a good sign of a relationship, or maybe even the whole point of it? To ensure the other had food and bedding and shelter and clothing for survival? To be stronger and happier together?

Then wouldn't it mean something to wear it again and show Dib his appreciation?

Hmm, but it wasn't the sort of thing humans wore in the streets during the day. It was sleepwear, if Zim understood right.

Well, it was evening- the day had gone by thanks to that stupid homework and research and everything else. It would be night soon. The 'pajamas' would be appropriate in just a few hours would they not?

Zim stuffed the T-shirt and sweat-pants into the storage section of his pak, donned his disguise, and set out, armed with a laughably tiny amount more knowledge in human affection and overly confident that this would carry him through.

He arrived at Dib's house, and pressed the alerting button. Silence. Nothing happened. He waited. Nothing. He rang again.

Then a third time.

No one answered the door for him! Zim attacked the bell with continuous rough jabs but no cheerful Dib-human came to open the door and see him in! Getting impatient quickly, the irken slammed the door open, finding it had been unlocked, and marched in to glare around at the furniture. No Dib where he could see. No Gaz either. He adjusted his fake-hair, brushing his claws through the substance in a nervous habit he'd picked up from Dib.

"DIB-HUMAN!"

He screamed, stomping through the living room.

"YOU DID NOT GREET ZIM AT THE DOOR! COME HERE RIGHT NOW!"

In a mixture of sadness and irritation, the alien wondered if Dib was not at home. What a waste of time this would have been then! Oh! But he could wait here for him to get back! Unless he would be gone a long time?

Zim was just wandering into the kitchen, decided that if Dib and Gaz were both gone he could eat some of their food without any retribution, when he heard a door slam upstairs. The irken jumped, spinning around, but he recognized the approaching scent and footsteps.

"Oh good! There you are!" He chirped, strutting back out of the kitchen and watching Dib jump the last few stairs to the bottom.

The human looked frazzled and he didn't smell right. He still seemed happy to see Zim, but at the same time he hung back fearfully.

"You never told me you were coming!"

Zim shrugged. "This is a surprise for you then! Surprise! You're welcome."

Dib smiled but glanced away and drew in a deep breath, shifting from foot to foot. He had his jacket on, and his left sleeve was pulled down over his hand and clutched in his fist. His hands shook.

Zim squinted, slowly frowning. It was obvious all was not well. Dib frowned at the silence that stretched out. "What?"

"Are you ill?"

Dib paled. Quickly he shook his head.

"No, I'm not ill. I'm fine!"

"No you're not. Tell Zim what is wrong."

The invader stepped forward into Dib's space, cocking his head, with his eyes narrowed. Dib backed off and gripped his sleeve tighter.

"Nothing's wrong!"

Dib's eyes were wide.

Zim smelled something metallic, and a hint of physical pain in Dib's hormones which he was now paying close attention to.

"You're injured!" That wasn't a question. It was a fact.

Dib pulled his left arm behind his back, stepping away, eyes wider, all an automatic reaction.

Zim stepped up after him.

"You stupid, fragile flesh-blob! What did you do? Let me see it!"

Zim reached out and Dib pulled away, pale and tense like a cornered animal. The irken was taken aback by Dib's resistance. He'd been so compliant with everything after their confessions until now! Zim glared.

"ZIM DEMANDS YOU LET ME SEE IT!"

This time, instead of grabbing, Zim held out one hand insistently, his other hand on his hip.

Dib was backed against the stairs, and upon realizing that, he seemed to get ahold of himself better, and stopped hiding his arm behind his back, but didn't give it to Zim, mumbling, "It's no big deal. I just tripped and cut it on the corner of my desk."

Zim wasn't taking no for an answer. He swung out again, and this time grabbed Dib's arm, pulling his sleeve up for inspection. The human flinched, but he did not pull away. Zim wasn't going to give up, and he didn't want to argue.

A bandage was wrapped around Dib's arm, just below his wrist, stained red with blood. It didn't seem to be bleeding TOO profusely, and it couldn't be too big given the size of the bandage.

Zim was satisfied that his earthling was not in any continuing danger. But then he paused, discovering a patterning that covered Dib's whole forearm. His face blanked. Dib saw his expression and pulled his arm away again, his stomach turning over, clutching his wrist in his other hand as if burned. Zim looked up at him and he painfully looked away.

"What did that?" Zim suddenly boiled in fury.

"Has something been CLAWING you?" That would make sense. They were strait, clean cuts after all.

Dib shook his head and swallowed thickly, then internally screamed at himself for not lying and saying yes, he had to say something!

Zim had seemed mad at that suggestion though, and he calmed down being assured that wasn't the case.

"What are those from?" The Irken's voice was stern. Dib looked into his ruby eyes, and he saw anger but also concern. His own tense fear suddenly melted into sadness, but at the same time a very strange sort of relief and almost-happiness came over him.

Zim was worried about him. Even if no one else did, Zim cared.

Care, simple care like that was something no one gave him and it was beautiful. Before he could get himself under rational control he felt such a wave of emotions rushing over him and he looked away so Zim wouldn't see if he started tearing up. He was scared and caught, but also somehow almost glad to have been caught, at least by Zim. There was something comfortingly final in the possibility that he could no longer get away with this horrible habit with no one to hold him accountable. Words came to him at last.

"If I promise you it will stop, will you not talk about it? I don't want to talk about it."

Zim opened his mouth to complain but then stopped. If Dib didn't tell him he would have no control over it, but Dib said he would take care of it. Zim growled.

"If it happens again you WILL tell Zim what it is?"

Dib nodded but Zim didn't feel any better and he wasn't going to let this go easily. Something had damaged what was HIS!

"I thought human 'relationships' were supposed to take care of each other! Isn't it Zim's job now to get rid of whatever is hurting you? You're making this difficult human!"

Dib bobbed his head and bit his lower lip in understanding, but smiled at Zim, gratefully.

"I know, I'm sorry, and you're right! And it means so much to me that you're trying to do that for me but this is... I need to take care of this myself. Can you understand that?"

Zim sighed heavily. "No. But Zim will honor your request just this once, ONLY because it does not seem to have done THAT much damage to you."

"Thank you."

"You WILL make this stop then? Zim doesn't want one more scar on your arm! Not even one! Or Zim will destroy whatever is hurting you himself! Really I don't see why you don't let me-"

"I'll make it stop, I promise."

Zim really didn't understand what he was doing. Dib thought he was glad for that.

He didn't want to talk about it. Physical hurts distracted him from emotional hurts, and it became an addictive habit. That was all it was. Now he had a reason to stop and he was going to do his very best to do so, Zim as his witness. That decision felt good actually. It was freeing somehow. It gave him a sense of purpose he'd been sorely lacking for so long. He gave Zim a thankful smile. The irken gave in and let that be the end of the topic.

"Where is the Gaz-monster?" Zim questioned casually. Dib's shoulders drooped.

"She's gone at a gaming convention for the weekend."

Zim perked up. He didn't like Gaz at all and saw this as a very good thing, but Dib was upset about it. Having given more thought to human social needs recently, he could guess why.

"And the Dib's father-unit will likely be at work the whole weekend also, and you are bored and lonely?"

Dib was surprised by Zim's insight, and it showed on his face. Usually the irken didn't seem to be the most intelligent when it came to psychology or emotions but now he'd hit the nail on the head.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Well that ends now! Because Zim is here now!" The irken struck a heroic pose, hands on his hips, his chest thrust out.

"Oh yeah!" Dib was struck back more fully to the present.

"Did you come to eat dinner here, or...?"

"Zim came to spend time with his Dib-thing, as I believe the spending of time together is a necessary thing now? And also Zim has nothing better to do and, I think, I would rather not sit alone with nothing to do all weekend either. So now we can sit around with nothing to do but, together, instead of alone. That will be less boring for both of us yes?"

Dib felt his heart clench with the knowledge that Zim had come PURELY to see him and be with him.

"Wait so, are you spending the night?"

"Yes, that's correct."

Dib's intentions were innocent, but his stomach still spun at that thought.

"Uhm, should I set you up with a place to sleep?"

"Irkens don't need sleep."

"O-oh?" Dib couldn't hide his surprise. This... Could end up being a really long night.

"Well humans DO need sleep, and I've had... kind of a long day, so I hope you won't mind when I have to go to bed?"

"Meh." Zim examined his claws casually. "I suppose if you must you must. I could either make sure nothing comes to eat you in your pitiful, helpless state, or join you. I suppose a recharge might do Zim some good.

'Join him.' That wording made Dib blush.

"Okay! Yeah, sure." Dib nodded. "So, I, uh, see you're dressed up again?"

Zim grinned as Dib brought it up on his own. "Yes! Do you like it?"

The boy's eyes ran over the smooth, green skin of Zim's exposed slender arms and neck and his hormones answered before his brain.

"Yeah! I, I think it looks nice on you- but, uh, do YOU like it? I mean, really, don't feel pressured to wear anything uncomfortable! Your uniform is cute too- SHIT! No, no, I meant, uh." Dib covered his mouth, his face becoming very red. When would he learn to keep some thoughts to himself? Zim didn't seem to mind though. The irken just raised one hairless eyebrow.

"Really? You think Zim's uniform is 'cute?'"

Wow. All these earth-outfits had turned out to be mind-numbingly unnecessary.

"I-I guess, yeah." Dib stuttered, pushing his toes into the carpet awkwardly.

"Oh! Speaking of clothing," Zim continued. "At what time can a human change into the sort of apparel they wear for sleeping?"

Dib was confused. "Anytime you want technically, usually before you go to bed. Some people change into their pajamas as soon as they get home from work or school according to what I've heard though. You just don't usually want to wear them in public."

Zim perked up.

"Excellent! Then Zim is going to go put on sleepwear! Get out of the way of the stairs! I demand use of your bathroom!"

Zim bumped past Dib and rushed up the steps past him.

Dib found himself smiling and laughing a little, greatly curious to see what irken pajamas would look like.

"Would you mind if I change too?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

Zim slammed the bathroom door with a bang that made Dib wince. The alien was certainly noisy. Dib far preferred his presence to the endless, empty quiet of being alone though.

Dib was happy. Zim had given him a wonderful thing by just coming over to be with him.

The earthling undressed very quickly, getting dressed in his typical sleeping clothes, similar to what his gave Zim, a plain T-shirt and loose, baggy pants. Then he went to wait outside the bathroom.

A couple minutes later, Zim stepped out, finished dressing, and Dib stared in surprise.

Those weren't irken sleepwear- of course not, Zim said Irkens didn't need sleep, they probably wouldn't have pajamas!

Those were what he'd given Zim!

The human beamed, touched. "You like those?"

Zim nodded his head vigorously, grinning so his teeth showed. "Yes! They're nice. Your gift is much appreciated!"

Dib had originally just borrowed them to Zim but he wasn't about to ask for them back now. Man alive Zim was cute! He'd kept the bandana to tie the pants up at his waist too!

Zim had been right! Dib looked very happy to see the irken in his pajamas! Very happy. Dib's face went red too, in flattery Zim supposed, which seemed like a bonus.

"Soooo," Dib tried to break his own silent, adoring stare. "You wanna watch a movie?"

The irken shook his head. Earth movies were stupid and he was tired of TV.

"What about video games?"

Neither of them had ever gotten to play something multiplayer with a friend in the room before. Both of them found it quite a new and exciting and potentially hilarious situation. They played on the same team, gunning down the 'bad guys' with no rivalry between them to start arguments- though Zim accidentally shot Dib at least two dozen times. Dib didn't mind.

The human laughed hysterically when they found they could throw grenades into an in-game cafe and the hamburgers would not budge from their plates on the counters. By then it was getting dark. Zim was starting to notice that Dib would laugh at literally anything now and he'd laugh until he had tears streaming down his face.

Zim had never seen Dib in such a state. It was concerning.

When the human decided it would be funny to place a sticky grenade on Zim's character's face, the irken decided that would be enough for tonight.

"Okay human, I think your body is needing sleep now."

"What? No way! This is awesome, come on!"

Zim had demanded the status of 'player one' and was able to pause the game for both of them with his controller. Dib pouted at him and groaned in exasperation, slumping back in the couch.

"Go to bed." Zim commanded.

"No, I don't want to go to bed yet. You go to bed."

The alien elbowed Dib roughly and the human yelped and fell onto his side.

"Owwwww!"

"Go to bed before your brain melts."

"Zim that's not how it works- ow! Ow! Okay okay okay! Stop poking me! Would it kill you to trim your claws you jerk?"

Dib sat up clutching his now achy side, and tried to stretch and yawn while staying ready to swat away Zim's hands should he attack again.

"Can I trust you to not experiment on me in my sleep?" Dib grunted as he stood up and headed for the stairs.

"I already told you, I will be guarding your pitiful, helpless body to make sure nothing harms you."

"In other words you'll be watching me sleep?" Dib raised an eyebrow at Zim. The irken was undaunted and answered flatly.

"Yes."

Dib laughed nervously, surprised to find he wasn't irritated but trying to pretend he was.

"Weirdo."

"I am Zim."

"... That's hardly a proper response to... Oh, Nevermind."

Getting to his bedroom Dib flopped back onto his bed, his hands over his head, and sighed sleepily. He hadn't been staring at the ceiling for more then a second when Zim began to scold him.

"Your nest is already poorly made, I will not allow you to sleep while splayed out to be THAT vulnerable! Really human! Don't be stupid!"

Zim marched over and Dib looked at him half-annoyed and half-amused as the irken began pulling the covers out from under him, and then over him, effectively tucking the boy in to sleep.

"Your body goes underneath these coverings for warmth and protection! Have you not known this? How are you still alive? Did your parental units really not teach you how to build a nest at all? Are you this clueless?"

Dib just laughed, hiding his face as he knew he was blushing badly yet again at the alien's surprising signs of care.

The bed dipped beside him and Dib lifted his head, eyes suddenly wide in curiosity as Zim climbed up over and next to him. He felt his heart jump and as the irken adjusted the blanket over both of them, and then laid down on top of one of his arms.

The irken's slender body was light and cool as Zim pressed up close against him and Dib could only stare, dumbstruck, his heart speeding.

Not looking Dib in the eyes, Zim slipped his arms around him and laid his head on Dib's chest with a sense of entitlement.

"This is a human hug, and those can be performed laying down too, right?" Zim questioned, wanting to make sure he wasn't making a fool of himself.

Dib swallowed thickly and stuttered in a quiet squeak of a voice, "Y-yeah."

Zim nodded against the human's chest while Dib remained as still as possible, terrified that if he moved Zim would be disgusted and leave.

"I assume I can protect you just fine like this... And it is a healthy human bonding thing, is it not?"

"... Yeah."

"Okay, good, be honored then... And go to sleep now."

Dib stayed on his back for a long moment, still stunned, before gathering his courage, rolling toward Zim, and wrapping him up in his arms, hugging him close, burying his face against the Irken's fake hair and breathing in his scent through it.

"Thank you."

Zim stiffened anxiously, very worried that this was some ritual he hadn't known about and he wouldn't know how to respond. He wasn't sure what he was being thanked for. But Dib just sighed, happily and contentedly.

Zim could hear Dib's steady breathing. He could hear the thump-thump of his heartbeat. His strong arms were around him as though Dib were protecting him or at least treasuring him. The earthling was so warm. Heat flowed from him like a fountain and Zim found himself relaxing automatically.

He could see why humans did this. It was very, very nice.

It felt nice. It felt like victory and happiness and security and safety. The irken marveled in it.

It was past midnight and Dib was tired and very content. He was already falling half asleep when Zim suddenly shifted, having remembered something from his research.

"Oh yeah! One more thing!" He exclaimed, and leaned over Dib, and then in towards his face, pressing his lips into Dib's.

Zim did not understand the details of a kiss, so it was more of a nuzzle/head-bump, but Dib did not complain at all. He hummed in his barely conscious state, pressing his lips back against Zim's in the short time it lasted, before Zim cuddled back into his warmth, his head tucked under Dib's chin, on his side.

It was preposterous, it was pointless, it was impractical, this was a very strange thing to feel victory over. But he felt very victorious. He was happy. He was happier then he'd been in a long time. Dib was his. He could learn more details about what exactly that meant in the morning. For now he savored the moment, the feeling, the sensory perception of laying there, held tight and secure against the earthling.

Security. For once in his life he was secure.

Victory. For once in he life he had won.

And there was something else. This belonging and owning, it was beautiful, he liked it, he liked it very, very much.

Dib was his.

**~•~•~•~**

**End**

**((This may get a sequel, or be continued at some later date, but this was as far as I'd planned for now.**

**Hope you enjoyed! Read and Review please! ^^))**


End file.
